relationship advice (post new situation)
Last year I moved in with a man that I had been dating 4 years. He is raising his ex-wife's grandchild, he also has a 22 year old son who moves in and out of the house, we don't get along. I was unemployed so I relied heavily on this man, we are engaged but no one in his family knows this. When we argued I wanted to get away from these kids, he would not get away so it turned to be me against all 3 of them, I moved out 3 times, I stayed with relatives until I found a small studio apartment in which my fiance pays the rent. I still cannot find employment even though I have 2 master's degrees. He wants me to move back in with him, the boys are moving out to a house he is building for them, on the same land as his house. My problem is that I just do not trust him, he said he is very sorry and it will never happen again. I would not do this unless we are married because then I would have a say in the household, I did not before, this was all his. I am so depressed because of the economy and he said not to worry that he doesn't mind taking care of all of the bills, I hate this situation and feel helpless and powerless, and at times suicidal, I have had lots of therapy before and do not want to go this route again, I know what the situation is. My question is since we both have so much fun when his kids are not around, should I move back in with him, we both love each other very much; I don't want to feel powerless again, it would just be the 2 of us. Please let me know what to do, my lease is almost up.
posted by JoAnne (age 55) on 8/16/2009 @1:25:47 PM •
ok...i know what does a 15 year old know anything about this stuff, well dont judge a book by its cover. i understand you love this guy and that you only want to be alone with him, but these are his kids i know that if a girl asked my dad to get away from me (even if i wasnt a minor) would litterally break me heart if he said yes. familly is everything work towards a relationship with his son...get to know him better , understand why he doesnt like you at the moment .... then work from there. your not gonna have a good relationship with him if you dont have one with his son. and you cant run away from it if it doesnt work out at first. one more thing if your trying to work out an relationship with his family..dont lie about the engagment itll make it worse. i sugest talk to this man....compromise. nyways i hope you take this advise to heart...have a wonderful life godbless =]
posted by LIZ (age 15) on 8/16/2009

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