family advice (post new situation)
"Not geeting along with hubby"
My husband and I don't get along.Things were not great but earlier but atleast he was not that big MCP.but recently his mother stayed with us for abt 4 months and turned him into a total MCP.She accused me of not treating him like a "man of the house".Both of them togather ganged up against me on smallest of issues and blew them up and one day thigs got so bad that the police had to come.The problem is that I don't work and i have a 6mo old.They believe that either i earn and if i am a housewife then i shd just shut my mouth and say nothing regarding household matters.He does not allow me to spend money and to put it simply loves living in a rut with bare minimum things.I understand his point of view and so try to come on a middle ground where we need not buythe expensive things in the market but maybe buy a used 2nd hand item which would not cost much but still look nice.Like for eg we came to the US abt 3 years ago.He has a good job and i wanted a decent TVbut he picked up a 19inch TV somebody had thrown away in the trash.I was like ok....this was 3 yrs back.I tell him that we can buy a used big screen for a good price but he is like no we cant afford it and i know we that's the case for every item in the house.I dont feel good abt the things we have in the house.We have a house that's been paid for from the country we have come.We have aused car.We never go on holidays...i hardly i wrong in wanting little decent things for house?
posted by Rakshanda (age 33) on 3/3/2010 @3:02:35 PM •
No not really. The thing is that, times are hard. I can't blame him for being the way he is but at the same time. You could get a job and buy the things that you think the house could use. Let him handle the bills and the groceries, trust me it can be expensive. A 19" is a bit extreme but I can understand where he comes from. You have a 6mth old baby. Trust me I hope he is saving everything he isn't spending because yall are going to need it. His mother should stay out of it. If you are married he should be on your side no matter what his mother says. Maybe he's not a man. Sound like you have a lot of soul searching to do to see whats more important to you. BEST OF LUCK TWO YOU
posted by Sydney (age 23) on 3/15/2010

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