relationship advice (post new situation)
"Money issues with friend of 30+ years"
I have had this particular friend since junior high school. We have probably been closer over the past couple of years than in the previous 25 years.

I invited this friend to come along to a vacation in Mexico. I paid for the room (which wasn't much) but we each had to pay for the all inclusive part of the resort which was about $350 per person. I paid for this on my credit card and asked the friend to write me a check when she saw me next. She forgot. She continued to forget for another 3-4 weeks, even though we had gotten together several times. Eventually I was speaking to her and she eventually said to me, "well, I'm not really worried about you, we can work out the money when we go on the trip in 6 weeks." Well this bothered me since she knew she owed me money, so I asked her to write me a check. She said ok, but she didn't do so. I asked her just to drop the check in the mail, and she failed to do so. She later explained that she would bring it over in the evening but I was busy and getting a little annoyed with her so I asked her to please just drop it in the mail. She later told me that she didn't want to have to worry about the mail getting lost.

Several more weeks went by and she still didn't pay me. I was really irritated at her behaviour by this point. She does not have financial problems, she's quite well off. She used points to pay for her airline ticket and the trip was not expensive since all she had to pay for was the board.

My son and his girlfriend accompanied on this trip and 3 days before we left, we upgraded to economy plus on the flight, which cost $100 per person round trip. I had originally wanted to do this but my friend had told me we could do it at any point, even at the gate, so we could think about it. Well I thought about it and my son is 6'3" and I wanted the extra legroom. I called my friend the next day and told her she should upgrade and she screamed at me and told me I should have asked her in advance, then she hung up on me. Funny thing was, she wasn't sitting next to us on the plane anyway because she didn't bother to book her seat next to us. So I couldn't figure out why it was such an issue.

I really was NOT looking forward to sharing a room with this person by the time the trip came around. I did my best to just tolerate her cheapness. She rarely bothered to tip the hardworking waiters. Everytime I did so she told me she would get it next time, though next time never came.

Since we've come back it's been about 8 weeks and I haven't spoken to her since we flew back. She charged me $180 for 2 concert tickets 4 months prior to the concert, which is not coming up. I don't know what to do about the situation. I don't want to go with her but I would like to get my tickets and maybe just meet her at the concert. I don't know why she never gave me the tickets I paid for, but she is controlling so it's probably that. What should I do about the concert? I'm ready to write her off as a friend.
posted by Vicky (age 46) on 8/5/2010 @6:19:11 PM •
* no advice has been shared.

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