family advice (post new situation)
"What did I do wrong?"
I am a only child,have five children. My husband and mom are in a nursing home. I work 2xaweek and live alone. Weeks ago I called my son in law and asked him if I could have a surprise 40th birthday party for my daughter. He said sure,we get along well.i thought. He said my home was too small so he offered his than his mom offered hers. There we are at his moms home. I wish he told me if he didn't want me to do this. I tried to arrange things with my granddaughter(15) I bought and made food,got decorations ect. Than people were invited who I an uncomfortable with. I did not know till I got there. They decided on so many things I didn't eve n know about.i helped decorate the night before. That day I picked my mom up and when we got there the cousin and mother in law had everything in control and pushed me aside,wouldn't let me be involved. Things were said and done at the party that shouldn't of been done. There were children there . A lot of things were said about me. My son in law said I was a pain because I kept calling him about the party. No he kept texting me? My daughter is not talking to me because things were said. Why did he let me think I was giving my daughter a party ? I want to go and be by myself. That's how I feel alone!
posted by Lee (age 67) on 11/18/2013 @7:01:50 AM •
Siunds like your son-in-law thought your idea of a party was so great he and his mom "took it over" without telling you they were taking it over. Unfortunately, there are a lot of insensitive people out there. I can see that it would be hard for you with your husband and mom in a nursing home. Is there some other social or group situation you can find to help fill that void. I'm in a somewhat similar situation. It's hard to be betrayed like that. Good luck.
posted by marla (age 61) on 11/29/2013

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