family advice (post new situation)
"Cruel sister in law"
Hello! My sister-in-law (call her 'Noreen' - not her real name) invited us for Thanksgiving. I asked if she was inviting her sister, 'Carol' (not her real name), and she said NO. Carol is currently living in a nursing home. She is fine physically, but has mental health issues. In the past, she has had greasy hair and worn dirty clothes, and not had her dentures in. The last time my husband (their brother) saw her, though, she did look presentable. Anyway, Noreen stated she was not inviting Carol because of her appearance. She said the way she looks is just 'not appetizing'. I was appalled by her remark!!! I told her that she HAD looked better the last time Husband saw her, but that didn't seem to make any difference. I told Husband I am NOT going to go to Noreen's house for Thanksgiving. I am so disgusted with her! (Years ago, she said something similar, and I was in frustrated tears about that!) My husband thinks it's OK to lie and say I'm sick, rather than telling the truth, and 'starting World War III'. (His words.) I also thought maybe I should email Noreen and tell her my husband is seeing Carol this week (not 100% sure he is yet). And I would like to ask her, 'What do you want him to tell her if she asks about Thanksgiving" Should he lie, or tell her the truth about why she is not invited"' I wonder what she would say!!! FYI, we are all in our 60s and the gathering is ONLY for a few family members / siblings. What do you make of this situation? The whole thing just makes me sick. :( Thank you so much!!!
posted by Anna (age 66) on 11/18/2016 @9:51:12 PM •
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