relationship advice (post new situation)
"To stay, or not to stay..."
Well, I met this guy about 4 weeks ago..Hes my best friends boyfriends friend (if that makes any sense)
We get along really good, we have alot of chemistry and i just LOVE being around him..I really think im falling for him, hard. Well.. He has had a really bad past, He has had 3 ex girlfriends..and all of them hurt him pretty bad. Me and him arent dating...But were pretty close, We go out on dates, we kiss, we hold hand..we have even had sex....already. Things are going really good.
Amd Im falling for him...But!.....

He told me, since hes been hurt so bad in his past...he doesnt want to rush anything with me for a long time. He wants to take things really really slow.. I mean, I kinda like it...Bc its nice that im getting to know him and stuff, im just not use to soo use to rushing things. But maybe thats why my relationships never work... ?? hmm...
I just dont know what to do..He told me that he did like me..alot. and wanted to get to know me alot better..and every time were together he cant keep his hands off of me...We're basically dating...Im just scared that im going to fall for him and hes going to tell me its not working and stop talking to me.
I dont know what to do...Should i stay and wait and see what happens? Or should i just tell him that im scared of getting hurt.
Im just scared of taking a chance and putting everything i have into trying to make this work with him...and then it just falling apart and i get hurt.
I just got out of a two year relationship in sept. and ever since then...I havent had ANY luck with guys..Ive had 2 bf since him and they both lasted 2 weeks. pretty sad.

Sooo..can someone please help me,
Should i take a chance at getting hurt (again)
OR Give up and not even try....

Yours Truely,
posted by Jessica (age 18) on 3/4/2008 @4:13:08 PM •
My best friends, boy friends friend. Wow, couldn't just say 'this guy'? Haha, that's alright.

Well, let's start and say that you two apparaently are very close now. Nothing wrong with sex, just making a statement haha. Really, I don't think fearing a relationship is good. Espcially if you feel you two get along so well.

But of course, if you're unsure of what to do, and afraid of getting hurt, give it a bit more time. Hang out with him more, get to know him better. Make sure this is the right guy for a serious relationship, someone you truly consider spending the rest of your life with, or at least a few good years =P

If your afraid of rushing things, just ask him how he feels. Ask him if he's ready for a relationship. And if he says no, then keep working on it. And when you both feel ready, I'm sure he'll bring it up too. And about your recent relationships that haven't lasted long. Well, that happens. Can't expect them all to be long and happy. Sometimes you just go with your gut, and try new things. And that's not always bad.

Also, if he isn't ready for a relationship, and doesn't want one, at least you'll know if you take your time and wait it out. Get to know him, and again, make sure you're both ready. And if things don't work out, well use any cliche you want for dating. "Fish in the sea", etc.

Now, I'm probably not the best on relationship advice, considering I'm 17 and never dated. But still, who knows. I really hope things work out for you two. Or at least for you, if it doesn't go well with him. =D
posted by Jon the Mase (age 17) on 3/4/2008

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