relationship advice (post new situation)
"its all about her"
I met this girl and we started dating. to get to the point, she turned my world upside down. I let her borrow my new truck and she totalled it and got a dwi. She then borrowed my rental car with permission and drove into a ditch. These are just the starting issues. She is very self centered and not as mature as I wish she was. The problem is that I realy like this girl and cant seem to get away from her. I cant decide weather I should follow my heart or use my head. This is all so confusing when Im right in the middle of it. someone please help me.
posted by Chris Flagg on 12/20/2007 @1:42:05 AM •
OK. My first offering to you is that you should evaluate whether it is the girl you like, or your image of what she could be. Never ever go into a relationship with the hopes that someone will change. That is unfair to them, but also to you because they most likely won't, and you'll just be deluding yourself. That will just make both of you unhappy. Secondly, you need to question what your heart really is telling you. I know you are hurt by this girl, or you wouldn't have come here looking for advice. Sometimes love can be destructive, and your heart masquerades as your head to get you to go somewhere else. Obviously this person is on a path of destruction, so she probably isn't good for you. I think you'll come to realize that you don't need her as much as you think if you give yourself some time away from her. But lastly, I think you need to sit down with this girl and talk to her about where you are and what her actions are doing to you and your relationship with her. It is possible she doesn't even realize how hurtful she's being, and will turn around when you confront her. Also, it seems as though she walking all over you, even using you. It may help to stand up to her every now and then. But seriously man, don't let things go on as they are. Nothing good can come of that.
posted by Patrick on 12/20/2007

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