relationship advice (post new situation)
"my friends bf is cheating on her! HELP"
so heres the scoop, my best friend Blair threw a birthday party for her husband Corey. well... pretty much everyone was there. my husbands best friend Drew was there, i was mad because his gf (my friend) wasn't there. i asked him, "well where is she?" he replied that he was bringing some other hoe. I thought he was only playing, but it turns out that he wasn't! he actually brought another girl! i didn't want to make a big deal about it then and there, but i know they are still together, and i didn't want to have drama at Corey's party. now i want to tell Andrea but i don't like starting things. Charlie (my husband) said to leave it alone, that she probably already knows because she was calling him every 5 minutes. but what if she doesn't know? i don't like gossip, but i want to tell her. hmmm... she is my friend, but what if she does know? and i shouldn't bring up the drama. I NEED HELP! i have no idea what to do. plus, if she knew i was there then she would be mad at me if i didn't tell her. and her "best friend" jenn is the one who set the date up! i have know idea what to do.
posted by jeanie (age 21) on 3/31/2008 @12:26:03 PM •
wow thats a ****ty situation...drama or not, i think you should tell her..not only that her bf is cheating on her but that jenn did something as well..she needs to know and you can't just assume she would wouldn't make sense for her to stay with him and still know everything and her not ever talk about it..i don't think she knows and if she does then she does..but her respect for you will go up so much more and she will realize you are a very trustworthy and true friend, unlike i think you should talk to her about it definately..
posted by Jessica (age 18) on 3/31/2008
Well if you are a really good friend you would say something to your friend, cause just because she was calling eery mins don't mean she knows about it. I know that I would want my friend to tellme if my guy was taking some other chic to a party
posted by Tiffany (age 19) on 3/31/2008
Have you thought about talking to drew? Ask him if his gf knew that he was with another girl. If he was cheating, then give him the option of telling her, if he doesnt, then you have the right to tell your best friend.
posted by Tracie (age 16) on 3/31/2008
are you serious?!? you have to tell her! if you dont tell her and she doesnt know when she finds out shes going to be even more upset that u being her friend didnt tell her and she should really know that her "best friend" set it all up....i would really like to knw if i was being lied to by my boyfriend and best friend... wouldnt you??
posted by Shae on 3/31/2008
well if she really is your friend you need to tell her
but its best to find out if she knows already and if she does know let her know you know cus you can be there for her. its best you tell her cus otherwise this guys gonna keep hurting her and nobody deserves it
posted by mirabella (age 23) on 3/31/2008
hey i have gone through this before and i told my best friend what was going on while she wasnt there and yeah she was a little mad at me at first because i didnt tell her right away, but after the fact she confronted her boyfriend about it and can you believe he did this 2 months before there wedding and she broke it off with him because come to find out he had done this before so you dont know how many times this guy has done this to your bedt friend so i would tell her she has the right to know just think what if it was your husband that did that to you wouldnt you want your best friend to tell you? I know that I of luck to whatever you decide to do..
posted by ashley (age 18) on 3/31/2008
Well when i read this i wanted to say yes immediately. BUt your right about the what if? questions. To play it safe I would tell my bestfriend what I saw.

I might start out with a normal conversation and change the subject to asking her if she was having any trouble with her bf. If she didnt tell me that she knew he was cheating then i'd tell her then. But you'll have to expect the whole back fire incase she blames you for waiting so long to tell or for you to bring it up. I would just let her react and try not to take it seriously.

At least you told because you care about her. Because thats what best friends do, they look out for each other. Thats what i think anyways ^_^'
posted by Kajo (age 18) on 3/31/2008
Hey hun,
hey my advice to you is that she is your best friend she needs to know that she is with a player. Best friends always have eachothers back no matter what and if she doesnt believe she might be mad at you for awhile but she will find out the hard way. Then maybe your husband could tell her wat he saw two as a husband he needs to have your back two. I know you dont know me but trust me i have been there and done that my friend thanked me in the long run and now we are closer then ever..... goodluck hun
posted by Meagan (age 20) on 3/31/2008
I think you should tell her. You'd want her to tell you, wouldn't you? I'd want a friend to tell me if my man was two timing me. It's not right. It's not really's helping a friend. If you don't tell her...and he sleeps with other women, she could get a disease..or he could get another woman pregnant. You really need to tell her. She deserves to know. And if she already does know, maybe she's just ashamed to talk about it. But if that's the case, you need to tell her that she doesn't deserve a man like that, and she needs to get out. Once they start, they don't stop. Men never stop cheating. Once a cheater, always a cheater. It's like a game to them. My ex i was with for 2 years...only DIDN'T cheat on me 4 months in total. He couldn't stop. Just tell her, say, you're friend I want you to know this...tell her and that's it. You gotta do it.
posted by Michelle (age 18) on 3/31/2008

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