relationship advice (post new situation)
"Should I go"
My husband and I got married 5 years ago, had our wedding four years ago. We got into a huge arguement right before the wedding, but made up in time. His friends and brother who never approved of me, never rented their tuxes, flew in from Florida, and told us the day before the wedding they were not going to be in it. My husband had no one standing next to him, I had all of my bridesmaids. Since then, his brother has gotton married, everyone was in it, including my husband, another of the friends got married, all were in it, except my husband for medical reasons. Now one is getting married inJamaica, all are flying there to be in it. I am very upset. They never apoligized. I am also bitter at my husband. Now we are paying $3000.00 to go to Jamaica so he can be in this wedding. How do I not look at my husband the way I do, as a punk for allowing this. How do I not hate his friends, and sit through another perfect wedding when they ruined mines? I have tried to forgive them and not look at my husband in a negative way when he stands next to these boys, but I cant. They say that they didnt approve of me, but stood next to the other guys knowing that they were cheating. I wasnt.
posted by Mrs. Confused (age 28) on 5/27/2008 @10:45:47 AM •
I'm getting kind of angry just reading this! In my experience, the best thing to do is talk it out. I'm getting married soon, and most of my girlfriend's family have been rude, conniving or just plain mean to me since we've been dating. After nearly two years of enduring, I got to sit down with one of them for awhile and talk everything out. I finally got to speak my mind and ask all the questions I wanted. It took three hours.

I got my apology.

I still have more of her family members to go through; but until I express exactly how they've made me feel and get an apology for it, I'll be upset any time I have to have anything to do with them.

But I think the most important thing to take care of first is your husband. He needs to know exactly how it makes you feel when he happily participates with people who - either now or sometime in the past - have been way more than rude to you. Maybe if he knew exactly how it made you feel, he'd be less open to doing those things - or at least not happy about doing them.

Good luck!
posted by Jon on 6/3/2008

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