relationship advice (post new situation)
 
 
"cheating"
 
my bf admited to cheating and i have for given him coz i love him but i cant for get what he has done can anyone help?
 
posted by sophie on 8/1/2008 @4:22:52 AM •
 
WELL ONCE A CHEATER ALWAYS A CHEATER. I HAVE EXPERIENCED THIS 1ST HAND! THEY WILL APOLOGIZE EVERYTIME THEY DO IT... I WOULD GO ON A BREAK SEE OTHER PEOPLE AND A LIL DOWN THE ROAD I WOULD SEE WHAT HAPPENS.... MY BEST GIRLFRIEND FOR EXAMPLE HAS TAKEN BACK THE SAME GUY 7 TIMES AND EVERYTIME THEY BREAK UP IT IS BECAUSE HE HAS HAD SEXUAL RELATIONS WITH ANOTHER GIRL.. HE APOLOGIZES TELLS HER NEVER AGAIN, THAT HE HAS CHANGED, AND JUS EVERYTIME...ITS THA SAME STORY!
 
posted by FELICIA (age 19) on 8/1/2008
 
ok ive been in both of you situations before
with a girl whos cheated on me and i gave her a second chance and then i cheated on her and almost didnt get a second chance.

with that said i will say this
the saying 'once a cheater , always a cheater" seems to be very true to me.

because after we both gave each other chances she and i kept doing it to each other.
I kept doing it to her because i was in your situation ... i kept doing it too get back at her because she was doing it to me.

And before any of all that started we had been in a relationship for almost two years.

I regret EVER giving her that first second chance because NOW she wont get out of my life when I do try to move on.

Just be careful ... watch out for yourself.
Getting cheated on is the worst feeling in the world and if it was to ever happen again. BREAK UP WITH HIM.

Also consider reconsidering giving him a second chance ... your the victim you have ample time to do just that.

Peace and Love,
Michael (www.myspace.com/michaelmmoore)

 
posted by Michael (age 19) on 8/1/2008
 
well all i really have to say its good that u still love him.. and its wonderful that he came to u and told u wut he did but did u ask him why he did it? tell him tht its kinda hard to forget wut he did.. and most and formost make sure u tell him wuts gonna happen next time he cheats.. my ex cheated and i took him back and he didnt cheat on me for awhile after tht and he came to me as well but he ended up cheating again and i left him i told him i cant stand to be hurt and cheated on.. and i left him.. it hurt but i dont think nothing hurts more then knowing tht ur being cheated on... if this kinda helped let me know
 
posted by lanae (age 19) on 8/1/2008
 
Sophie, because your boyfriend had admitted he cheated on you, then just tell him it would be a good idea just to be friends for awhile till he has earned your trust. If he won't accept that then, you shouldn't worry about him. I know its hard to let go of someone you love, but you have to be mature to let him go, if it won't work out. Good luck
 
posted by kristin (age 18) on 8/1/2008
 
I have been through the same situation and it is not easy and you may forgive but you will never forget. THat is something you will never forget. I have been with my fiancee for four years and we have a daughter together but hear is a piece of advice from my expierence do not tell him that you forgive him untill you honestly do. Because everytime you fight you will through it up and he will ask well i thought you forgave me. And that will cause more problems dont forgive him untill you are ready to let it go. It will never go away but throwing it up will only cause more problems. Good luck
 
posted by Arika (age 18) on 8/1/2008
 
NOOO.
Its not always like that. Okay now I hvae cheated before,and i know it wasnt right but the only reason i did i was becuz he cheated on me with my bestfriend. So i mean i kno that two wrongs dont make a right but i mean just becuz i cheated ONCE doesnt mean im goin to do it again. So i think that saying 'once a cheater always a cheater' isnt correct. But in your case if you can forgive him and you can trust him enough for him not to do it again,then its all you and you shouldnt worry bout him.but if YOU have doughts that he is and you cant trsut him and you just love him then i think it would be time to move on and find a more heathly relationship were you dont have to worry where hes at or what hes doin and who is hes wit. Get my point.
 
posted by Alexandria on 8/2/2008
 
I think that if he seems genuine, you should give him one more chance, and if he ****s up again, then dump him. Once a cheater some times a repenter. I speak from personal experience.
 
posted by Asha on 8/2/2008
 
I was with a guy for 2 years. He even fathered my beautiful baby girl. I'm no longer with him. He cheated througout the whole relationship. He'd always sit there and promise me over and over again that he'd never do it again, but it was inevitable. He did it every time. Til finally I left. I don't believe in the once a cheater always a cheater thing...it all depends. If you cheat on someone, it's because either, you don't care for them as much as you tell them you do, or they hurt you real bad and you just don't care. My boyfriend did it because he was an ****, and it became a game for him. To me, he'd always be a cheater. Who knows, he may find someone else that makes him happy and he'd never cheat on them. I say this because after he cheated on me the 7th time...I cheated on him once. To show him how it felt. BUT, the man I'm with now, I would NEVER do that to. I love him more than anything, and I don't need anybody else. Your boyfriend may just be losing feelings for you. And once you let him get away with it once, he's gunna think he can always get away with it. Give him this ONE chance, and after that, I'm telling you...don't give him any more chances. It's going to take you a long time to get over it...if you ever do. But as for right now, it's going to take over your life. It's going to drive you nuts. You're always gunna think he's lying...you're always gunna wonder where he is, who he's with...you're gunna go crazy, I'm telling you. But if he's worth it to you...go for it. Look deep inside your heart, you'll know what's right..
 
posted by Michelle (age 19) on 8/26/2008
 


 
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