relationship advice (post new situation)
Ok well im 'dating' this guy and i dont honestly know how i feel about him.
i think i only like him as a friend but i dont want to hurt his feelings.
He tells me he loves me all the time.
and i say i love you too but i dont know if i do.
im really confused.
and dont know what to do.
i know im not in love with him.
at least im pretty sure.
and he talks about the other girl all the time.
but he tells me he only likes her and loves me.
and i find myself wishing it was her he was with.
and he is always talking about sex and it makes me feel uncomfortable sometimes.
i think i want to break up with him but im not at all sure how to.
posted by Katelyn on 11/8/2008 @9:31:52 AM •
i think you need to sit down with this guy and have a long conversation. I know it isn't easy to be 100% honest but its the best way to be. trying to spare people's feelings by stretching the truth only hurts them worse when the truth is revealed. or if you do say or do things such to keep them happy you will find that you are one unhappy and trapped lady. 1.) Say how you feel about him. (Be Honest) If you want to still date him let him know that. if not let him know you just want to be friends or see other people. 2.) If you decide to continue dating let him know where you stand on sex, if he is always talking about it. If you want to wait LET him know you do and stick by your decision. Or if you just don't like talking about it so much let him know that your not as comfortable with it as he does and you need him to be more respectful at times. 3.)As far as the other girl talk. (which will not help your self esteem at all let alone your relationship) Let him know that you don't need to hear about her unless it pertains to you. Say things like, "when you say stuff like... [give an example] it makes me feel... [example unappreciated]". Don't blame him just let him be aware of your feelings. And if he wants to be with her he should not be with you. Try to be clear and direct. 5.) remember that your partner needs to understand and care about your needs as you do his. Its a give and take. You sacrifice together and compromise together. If you don't have that bond what is there to hold you two together and be HAPPY. Thats what you want to find and keep looking until you do.
posted by Ashley (age 22) on 11/9/2008

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